Hi, and (if I may be so bold) — how are you?
If you live in the present, here’s a hug. If you live in the future, please tell us a little bit about what that’s like in the comments because we all desperately want to know.
I think those of us who can find some sanctuary amidst the turmoil going on around us are incredible fortunate. I’ve been finding it in my faith, in the company of my family, and in the small joys that everyday life offers. It’s so hard not to feel incredibly guilty at the same time. But for some of us, life goes on. And I’ve been using silly little things to observe the relentless march of life. Like writing. These days, I’ve been using writing to have fun.
I don’t want it to be challenging. I don’t want to even attempt to unpack the mysteries of internet culture or the enigmas of the soul. I don’t want to unearth deep ideas or feelings, or push myself too hard. I just want to enjoy it. I want it to be easy.
This is my easy work. I’m so grateful to have this space as a sanctuary too, to do whatever I want and still hit publish.
So anyway, over the past few months, I’ve been making a list.
Whenever I observe or feel something that I can’t find a phrase for, I come up with one. This blog is a compilation of some of my favorites. The overall list has reached 27 so far, but that would get way too boring. So here’s my current top ten:
Binge-Regret Bounceback
Definition: The immediate feeling of needing to be super ultra productive after wasting hours on mindless entertainment.
On two separate occasions, I found myself putting away TONS of laundry after spending too long on Instagram, and decided that this needs to be a thing. I think it helps assuage the guilt of wasting all that time by doing something that might absolve you.
In case you need some binge-regret bounceback activities, I highly recommend putting stuff away – dishes, clothes, books, whatever.
“After finishing an entire season of Schitt’s Creek in one sitting, the binge-regret bounceback hit and I ended up reorganizing my entire closet.”
Meh-Time
Definition: The paradoxical feeling of longing for solitude, finally attaining it, and then being immobilized by the sudden abundance or absence of choices for spending that time.
It’s that jolt of frustration when you crave alone time, get it, and then don’t know what to do with yourself. Like, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve thought of all the things I would do when my daughter was taking a nap. I’d bake cookies, or read that article that I’d bookmarked. And then suddenly, she’s off to sleep and I don’t know what to do. Should I start with the cookies and read the article when they’re in the oven? Have I been working too much, and should I just sit down and relax?
But sit down and relax and DO WHAT? Browse Instagram? That’s dumb – I think to myself, as I browse Instagram.
This is classic meh-time.
Meh-time can manifest as aimlessly pacing in your room, starting numerous tasks and leaving them unfinished, or just being meh on your phone or laptop.
“I spent the whole week eagerly anticipating a weekend without any plans, but I found myself stuck in a loop of meh-time, flipping through channels and never settling on a single show.”
Posh Pangs
Definition: The subtle yet gnawing hunger experienced after indulging in a high-end dining establishment, where the portions are artistically petite and you tend to under-order because of the prices.
It usually happens when you go to a nice, posh place for dinner. You savor each bite, basking in the burst of flavors, praising the chef’s artistry. You nod in agreement when your dining partner comments on the intricate presentation. But deep inside, there’s that nagging thought, “I’m going to need a snack after this.”
You leave the restaurant on a high, patting yourself on the back for experiencing fine dining at its best. But by the time you reach home, there’s a familiar feeling. It’s the onset of posh pangs. It’s an appetite reawakened that serves as a gentle reminder that sometimes, beauty doesn’t fill the belly.
My posh pang snack options are instant noodles, cookies, or whatever’s in the fridge.
“What are you eating out of the box?
Oh this is just yesterday’s noodles.
But I thought you went out for dinner.
Yeah but then the posh pangs kicked in”
Late Night Logic
Definition: The sudden clarity or profound realizations that occur when one is sleep-deprived or up extremely late.
Suddenly, life’s puzzles seem solvable, or you find yourself drafting an earnest, heartfelt message to someone you’ve not spoken to in years. Maybe it’s the quiet of the night, the stillness of the world, or the altered state that comes with lack of sleep, but there’s a strange brilliance to the thoughts that emerge. They might be the most coherent ideas you’ve had all day or the bravest decisions you’ve ever made – that sounds like a case of late night logic.
I use late night logic quite often – either to reply to a difficult message, or write the conclusions of my essays. My thoughts during the day are constantly interrupted, and if I have to do some logical thinking, it usually happens late in the night.
“I was struggling with that concept for weeks, but thanks to some late night logic, it all clicked at 3 a.m., and I wrote down the entire plan.”
Validation Hot Box
Definition: A self-imposed echo chamber where an individual consistently seeks advice or opinions only from those who reaffirm their existing beliefs and feelings, borne from a desire solely for validation and not variation.
Ever found yourself in a situation where, post a bout of late night logic, you’re bursting with new ideas or conclusions, yet when seeking advice, you subtly gravitate towards friends that you know will back you up? If you’re intentionally avoiding diverse opinions, favoring only the voices that mirror your thoughts, you’re cozying up inside a validation hot box.
It’s natural to seek comfort in the familiar, to want assurance that our beliefs are correct. However, growth often comes from people challenging us, that includes challenging our own beliefs and preconceptions.
Embrace those who are willing to provide a different viewpoint, who question your ideas, not to bring you down, but to elevate your understanding. It’s invaluable to have trusted friends who, out of genuine concern and goodwill, will constructively disagree, helping you see things differently.
“Every time they’ve shared a new idea, they only ask those who would agree with them. They’ve been in a validation hot box for so long, they can’t handle any constructive criticism.”
Atlas Ambition
Definition: The desire to take on massive responsibilities or challenges, often at the expense of one’s well-being.
If you’ve ever felt the compulsion to oversee a gargantuan project single-handedly or thought you could solve all of your work problems overnight, then you’ve likely been fueled by Atlas Ambition. It’s the overwhelming belief that one can – and must – take on tasks far beyond a normal scope, whether due to a sense of duty, desire for recognition, or a genuine belief in one’s capabilities.
Often, the Atlas Ambition phase is just for a season. You decide to prioritize something, at the expense of other important stuff, but you acknowledge that it’s temporary. Sometimes, Atlas Ambition can lead to astounding successes and tales of legendary accomplishments.
But eventually, the weight of such aspirations, like that of the heavens on Atlas’ shoulders, can become too burdensome, leading to a big crash. If you are in an Atlas Ambition phase, check in with yourself. A lot!
“He decided to manage three major projects at the same time, burning the candle at both ends. His Atlas Ambition was commendable, but it took a toll on his health and relationships.”
Deja View
Definition: The unexpected encounter when you look in the mirror and there’s a sudden replay of life choices, decisions, and evolutions that shaped the person staring back.
Sometimes in the morning when you’re in front of the bathroom sink and you look up and for a second you don’t just see your reflection, but a brief flashback of choices and experiences that led to the current version of yourself.
It’s usually really brief, because you can’t spend all day standing in front of the sink obviously. I think these happen more often as you get older.
“Woah, that was a weird deja view moment.”
Clickbait-and-Switch
Definition: The digital deception of luring users with an irresistible caption, thumbnail, or opening line, only to serve them content that is either underwhelming or utterly unrelated.
Have you ever been enticed by a headline like, “You won’t believe what happened next!” only to click and find out that you absolutely can believe what happened next? Congratulations, you’ve been Clickbait-and-Switched.
This tactic feeds on our innate curiosity, leading us down rabbit holes of mediocre content, and often leaving us wondering why we even clicked in the first place. It’s all the rage on Instagram reels.
Reels are rife with clickbait-and-switch tactics: Check caption for details!
(And then you click on the tiny little caption at the bottom only to discover the most asinine information on the planet). Why?
“The tweet claimed to reveal a celebrity’s secret to flawless skin, but after getting clickbait-and-switched, I found out it was just an endorsement for bottled water.”
Tab-Liberation (tab-lib)
Definition: The digital exhale experienced when closing a browser crowded with tabs, symbolically parting ways with the older, overwhelmed version of oneself and welcoming a rejuvenated, clutter-free state of mind.
Since I’ve been working from home for a while, I’ve cultivated a little end-of-day ritual: closing all my browser tabs. For me, it’s the digital equivalent of tidying up your desk, packing your bag, and leaving the office.
It’s not like I only go all tab-lib when I’m done with my tasks – the to-do list still lurks. It’s not a declaration that all tasks are complete, but more like a step towards a fresh, unburdened start the next day.
“Yesterday, when things got overwhelmingly chaotic, I granted myself a tab-lib, promising to approach things with a clear head and a decluttered browser the next day.”
Risky Reheat
Definition: The conundrum faced when one has to serve themselves a meal that combines refrigerated leftovers and freshly cooked food, often resulting in a plate with varying temperature zones – from arctic chill to molten lava.
Now before you come for me – I know you could just NOT microwave the food that’s already hot, and only microwave the stuff from the fridge, and then serve yourself the fresh, hot stuff. But that’s already too much for me to navigate.
What if there’s yesterday’s pizza alongside today’s grilled veggies? One needs a good nuking while the other is just fine. But when you’re starving and desperate to dig in, you toss caution to the wind and do a risky reheat. The result? One part of your plate is fine and the other is scalding.
But that’s the price you pay.
“My hunger got the best of me, and in my rush, I just dumped everything on the same plate and did a risky reheat, so now I have a lukewarm quiche and sizzling mashed potatoes.”
Okay that’s all for now. Be good, stay awake. Bye!
Unfinished Conversations 
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